Stages of Dating Chemistry

Written by matthew caines
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Stages of Dating Chemistry
Leaning into each other's personal space is a sign of mutual chemistry. (secretos image by caironbohemio from

It is never easy to tell how the evening is going if you are on a date. Knowing how much chemistry there is between you and your date can be affected by nerves, emotions or even your surroundings. However, if you can understand the usual stages of dating chemistry, you will be much more alert and clued in about how to move things forward or slow them down.

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If any dating chemistry exists between you and your date, it will start from the meet and with an attraction. After all, if you are not physically attracted to your date then you will not treat the date as a romantic acquaintance. The attraction always occurs at the beginning of the evening and usually happens when you come face-to-face with your partner. Essentially, this is where you and your date will evaluate one another and get first impressions, which are based on factors such as physical traits (eyes, hair or sense of style), smells, voice or manners.


Rapport is the stage of dating in which people become personally attracted to each other. Essentially, this involves establishing similarities. If you and your date have things in common, you are more likely to treat your date as somebody you would like to know further. Things to establish rapport on can be as trivial as music and hobbies, but can be as deep as religion and morals. If you find your date wanting to talk more about your similar interests, then the dating chemistry is escalating. If, on the other hand, you find you are arguing or disagreeing over a subject it is likely that the chemistry will go nowhere or does not exist.


Although an obvious part of dating, having fun is a vital stage of romantic chemistry. For example, you and your date could be attracted to each other and have common interests, but if you are not having fun then things can deteriorate quickly. Having fun on a date usually consists of being funny, interesting or asking interesting questions. If you find you and your date having blocks of silence, then there is no chemistry. If, on the other hand, you find yourselves laughing and smiling then the chemistry is escalating.


This stage of dating chemistry occurs when your date is exclusively interested and attracted to you. Flirting occurs when you exchange words that carry a playful or sexual meaning. Because flirting is universally regarded as arousing sexual behaviour, it becomes the highest form of dating chemistry: the point at which you can determine if a date is sexually attracted to you or not. Common flirtatious behaviour for women includes touching her own hair or rubbing her skin; it may also include the offering of sexual innuendos. For men, flirtatious behaviour consists of him touching the woman gently or making significant eye contact.

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