Ways to keep the passive-aggressive happy

Written by erick kristian
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Ways to keep the passive-aggressive happy
Passive-aggressives are sometimes characterised as lazy. (Adam Gault/Digital Vision/Getty Images)

Passive-aggressive behaviour can take on many forms. Some passive-aggressives exhibit more pronounced symptoms than others. Keeping a passive-aggressive person happy is not necessarily easy to do and may require a fair amount of patience on the part of others. Still with a positive attitude and the knowledge that passive-aggressiveness is a mental disorder, you can keep the passive-aggressive person in your life happy.

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Set Goals and Expectations with the Person

Passive-aggressives can have difficulty completing occupational and social tasks. This problem is compounded if the tasks are placed on them externally. Passive-aggressives will be much less likely to respond to direct orders. Instead, sit down with the person, and discuss a list of goals the person must achieve, and go over the list with him to make sure he is also creating the list. This will put the responsibility for the tasks on him and plays on his ego.

Encourage Communication and Let Them Speak

Passive-aggressives occasionally complain of being misunderstood and not heard or appreciated. Dedicate time to hearing the needs of the passive-aggressive. Let her speak, ask follow-up questions and develop a genuine interest in her life. Show affection; a hug, pat on the back, smile and invitation to join the group will go along way toward making her feel happy.

Do Not Engage in Arguments

Passive-aggressives can be prone to arguments and criticising others. If they try to start an argument, just let it go. Passive-aggressives will also often drop nasty remarks, or pick at something to get a rise out of others. Again, just let this go rather than responding. If a response is necessary, then keep the voice calm, polite and simply state that you do not appreciate the comments.

Spend Time with Others

Passive-aggressives can often be reclusive. This can result in them sinking into depression. Spending time with others is one of the ways passive-aggressives can overcome depression and be happy. When passive-aggressives are alone for long periods, then anger, depression and brooding can occur.

Remind Them of How Fortunate They Are

Passive-agressives tend to complain a lot, about personal misfortunes and how hard their lives are. Have the passive-aggressive volunteer with people who are in need, like the homeless or underprivileged youth. This can help the passive-aggressive person see how fortunate he is.

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