Signs of Unavailable Men

Written by cynthia tucker
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Signs of Unavailable Men
An unavailable man never gives enough to have a real relationship. (Jupiterimages/Comstock/Getty Images)

Women often get involved with men who seem to be almost exactly what they want, but have a few issues. What they don't realise is that they could be dating an unavailable man. An unavailable man is one who gives only enough to a relationship to keep the woman hanging on but never gives enough to have a real relationship.


Rather than talking on the phone or in person, an unavailable man tends to prefer communicating by text, chat or e-mail. He typically does this because he wants to control the relationship and keep you at a distance until he is ready to draw you closer. Men often choose non-verbal communication because they aren't interested in a real relationship with you,. For this reason, they never make the effort to engage in a deeper level of communication. If you are in this situation, you probably don't talk much to him in between dates. Texting, e-mailing and chatting are all valid ways of communicating; however, they should not be the primary means.

Lack of Commitment

Despite the length of time you've spent together, the unavailable man does not define the relationship. He will sleep with you, but if you want to discuss where the relationship is headed, he won't give you a straight answer. He makes excuses about why he can't commit and indicates that he will do so in the future when the time is right. The excuses may sound reasonable, but they are really stall tactics.


Unavailable men break dates. If you make a plan with him, you can't be sure if he will keep the date or not. He promises to call, but doesn't call when he says he will. He plans dates at the last minute rather than in advance, because you are not a priority. Therefore, you never know when you will see him.

Relationship Status

If a man is married or in a relationship, he is unavailable. This may seem obvious, but many women act as if this is not the case. They make excuses about why he can't leave the other relationship rather than accepting the situation as it is. A man in another relationship is not available to be in a real relationship with you. This includes men who are separated or divorced but still emotionally entangled with their ex.

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