How to Cope When Someone You Love Ignores You

Updated February 28, 2017

Relationships with friends, family and other loved ones are big parts of life. There are times that these people are your greatest assets. Unfortunately, there are also times when they are not always physically, mentally or emotionally available to give you support. If you feel that someone you love is ignoring you, there are a few things you can do to help bring this situation into better light.

Find the happiness within yourself. As much as you can love others, they are not the true source of your happiness. Happiness comes from within. Find an activity that makes you happy. Pick up a book, get a massage, take a long bath, exercise, enrol in a class you always wanted to, or do anything else that brings happiness into your life. Once the happiness returns to your life, the person that is ignoring you may come around. Your unhappiness, although unintentional, may have been pushing that person away.

Observe the person's behaviour. Is there something bothering him, is work stressful, or are there money issues? These factors may cause the person to go into a contemplative mode. You may be misunderstanding his signals, and it may just be a thinking period. Although not always the case, men often deal with stress or other issues in their heads while women like to talk it out. Take this into account, as well.

Don't make drastic assumptions or conclusions from the silence. Imagination is often more dramatic and creative than the truth. If you automatically assume that the person doesn't love you anymore, or something along those lines, just because that person ignores you at times, you may cause more harm to your relationship with her. Give it some time to pass. If the silence lasts for an extended period of time, you should talk to her about it.

Get yourself in a calm, open-minded and loving mood. Think about the things that you love about the person. Once you are ready to discuss things calmly, approach him, when he's not in the middle of a task or something important. Gently ask him if there is something bothering him. Truly listen to his words. Ask if there is anything you have done, and address your feelings on the subject. Also ask if there is anything you can do to help ease his troubles or help in any way.

Make a date for quality time with the person. Do something fun you haven't done in awhile, such as going for a walk or cooking a meal together. Enjoy the time that you do get. Voice that you appreciate the person making time for you and that you enjoyed it. Try to make it a regular thing, if you can.

Do something nice for the person. Bring him coffee, leave him a thoughtful card, or offer to take him to lunch. Little things like that show that you are thinking about him and love him. Surprises are always welcome, and you may possibly elicit an unexpected thank you or attention that you have been craving. However, don't expect anything in return, as you may be disappointed.


If something doesn't work, don't give up. Try different approaches at different times.


You can't force someone to reciprocate loving feelings. You can't make a relationship work if both people don't want to be together. If a relationship doesn't work out, it is an opportunity to look for someone who will treat you the way that you deserve to be treated.

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