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How to Deal With a Jealous Stepmother

Updated November 21, 2016

According to CNN, stepmothers may have one of the hardest jobs in the world. What may be harder is being the victim of a jealous stepmother. Whether consciously or inadvertently, "wicked" stepmothers may cause friction or build barriers between children and their fathers. Dealing with a jealous stepmother requires class and patience. Handled correctly, a damaged relationship between stepchild and stepmother can heal . Handled poorly, it can spin out of control.

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  1. Identify the reasons for the stepmother's behaviour. Ask yourself what her intentions are in acting with jealousy: Is she a person with little confidence, for instance, or is she trying to command admiration? Take a look at her own family history --- her childhood and upbringing. Doing so helps you see things from a compassionate perspective and may help understand her feelings and her behaviour.

  2. Keep a cool head and remember that offensive behaviour is usually a result of projection. The stepmother may vary well project onto you flaws that she, herself possesses. Breathe and smile as often as possible --- in a respectful manner, of course --- and don't take accusations personally. The more you can keep a cool head, the less her jealousy will affect you; and, hopefully, the less she will use it as a weapon.

  3. Find attributes you both have in common and use these to build a connection. Focus positively on things you both admire --- fashion or community service, for example .. Concentrate on things that bring you closer together.

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About the Author

Jeffery Keilholtz began writing in 2002. He has worked professionally in the humanities and social sciences and is an expert in dramatic arts and professional politics. Keilholtz is published in publications such as Raw Story and Z-Magazine, and also pens political commentary under a pseudonym, Maryann Mann. He holds a dual Associate of Arts in psychology and sociology from Frederick Community College.

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