Most Important Things Men Find Attractive in Women

Written by marisa swanson
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Most Important Things Men Find Attractive in Women
Personality goes a long way when it comes to long-term commitment and falling in love, for a man. (couple image by Natalia Pavlova from

Most women are mistaken when they think looks are the most important thing to a man. Time and again on "what men find attractive," lists the majority of points are about personality. A man assesses a woman more on her personality than he does her looks when it comes to deciding his level of commitment.

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Men value a woman who has her own life and her own achievements. Just as women want to be proud of their man, men also want to introduce a woman that they can be proud of to their friends and family. To garner this pride, it's important that you have goals and an action plan to make them a reality. It helps that you have already achieved past goals. Another way to show that you are independent is to have your own hobbies, likes and dislikes. Don't be afraid to say that an activity of his isn't your cup of tea, but play up other similarities. When you are dating, be sure to maintain your group of friends without expecting him to participate or expect to be a constant fixture in his group of friends yourself. You are independent and have your own life.

Affectionate and Nurturing

Men may have a side that is focused purely on physical pleasure, but that doesn't mean that they don't enjoy and want affection. A woman who focuses too much on the act of sex without also delivering affection is likely to be considered as little more than a sex partner. Affection isn't only for the bedroom. Show your man you are affectionate by touching his hand when you're sitting across from one another. Give close, warm hugs. Men also enjoy a woman who they feel nurtures them. But it is a fine line between that and being too much like Mom. Show that you can nurture by picking an eye lash off his cheek or casually taking an errant hair or piece of lint off his sweater. Don't nag him to do things like clean his place or "bundle up."

Sense of Humor and Carefree Attitude

Many men list this in their top priorities when they're talking girlfriend or wife qualities. A girl who doesn't take herself or life too seriously is a big asset, as many women tend to complain or get upset about things that men view as trivial. Learn to laugh at the unfair or unsavory parts of life and you will go far with your man. Men also like women who are playful, regardless of their age. Being "youthful" in spirit is very attractive to men and goes hand in hand with a good sense of humour.

Be a Good Listener

Many women fall into the trap of only talking about themselves and their lives when they're with their guy. This behaviour comes off as needy and sometimes high-maintenance. Don't forget to ask your man how his day was, how the game went or what his favourite foods and activities are. Don't interrupt when he is talking about himself.

Stand up for Yourself

Men like to be challenged. It's common knowledge that they like a bit of a chase when they're interested in a girl. But they like to be challenged in conversation, too. For this reason, they will sometimes challenge the woman in an attempt to flirt or playfully bring up something that they're not crazy about. Don't get pouty and defensive when this happens. Instead, stand up for yourself and challenge him right back. Men want a woman they can respect. And this tit-for-tat game shows him that you are a woman to be respected.


Looks do matter, but it isn't always about being a natural-born knockout. Men just like to know that you take care of yourself. This means putting on a little bit of make-up and doing your hair. It's a fine line because some men don't like a woman who is too made up. Having a simple, put-together appearance is always appreciated. Make sure your clothes fit well. Men love a woman who dresses in a feminine way when the situation calls for it. Skirts and dresses to go out with your man show him that you care about your appearance. Men typically don't like women who obsess over calories, but being a healthy eater also shows him that you care about your body.

Down to Earth

Men don't like high-maintenance women, so it's important to have a balance. When you're relaxing at home, it's best to be clean, but casual. This is not the place for a miniskirt. When you're out on a special occasion, indulge in dessert, don't be nit-picky about your diet.

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