The signs of mutual attraction between a boy & a girl

Updated July 20, 2017

Boys and girls often tease each other and fight. Yet, these behaviours can actually be signs of attraction. Boys and girls act in certain ways when they are attracted to each other, using their social environment to express their feelings. They also show the same physical signs of attraction that are universal for people of all ages.


Elementary boys and girls over-identify with the same sex and prefer to play with kids of their own gender. Yet, they also find themselves attracted to members of the opposite sex. This results in young boys and girls teasing and play fighting when they are attracted to each other. A boy pulling a girl's hair is one example and is a common occurrence in this age group.

Notes and Friends for Communication

Elementary-aged kids pass notes to avoid asking important questions in person. Boys use notes to ask girls to "go with them." Boys and girls may use a friend to pass notes and relay messages so they may further avoid the stress of communicating face to face. This is especially helpful for boys who may be more uncertain how to express themselves than girls of the same age.

Taking Up for the Other

When boys and girls like each other, they take up for each other in certain social situations. A boy may defend a girl who is being teased by others, telling them to leave her alone. A boy and a girl who are attracted to each other will make their friendship known even if they do not spend much time together. They will let others know they like each other and will defend each other when needed.

Body Language

Body language also communicates attraction in similar ways across different age groups. A girl will face a boy to whom she is attracted and lean in toward him. When a boy and a girl are attracted to each other, they will face each other and keep themselves open, without any hands or legs crossed. They will also stand close to each other and touch each other.

Facial Expressions and Eyes

Regardless of age, there are some facial expressions and certain eye characteristics that show attraction. Pupils dilate when a person is looking at someone to whom she is attracted. And, a person blinks much more often in such situations. Eye contact and winking are also signs of attraction. And, a person will blush, smile, look down and laugh when she is attracted to someone.

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About the Author

Catherine Scruggs began writing professionally in 2011. She has also worked as a college instructor and a psychotherapist. Scruggs holds a Master of Arts in psychology from Columbia University and is working to obtain her doctorate in clinical psychology at Alliant International University.