After a funeral, the family of the deceased acknowledges all those who helped and contributed in some way with the funeral. It is proper etiquette to send acknowledgement or thank-you cards to those people. There are many different things to thank people for, including those who provided food, flowers or donations as well as those assisting in funeral services such as the organist, pallbearers and singer. You can choose to write your own thank-you notes or purchase pre-written ones.
Gather the names of those who you want to thank. Remember to include all those who helped in the various different ways. Many times, a friend of the family works with the family to help them gather a complete list of all those to thank. Looking in the funeral registry book is also another way to ensure you have included everyone.
Separate the names into categories. It is often easier to write acknowledgements if you separate them and write each category at one time. For example, separate all those who provided food and write those letters all at once. Another category is for those assisting in funeral services and that normally includes the pastor, singer, organist and pallbearers.
Write a heartfelt message. If you purchase pre-written cards, you may still want to include a short message that expresses your gratitude to the person for their assistance or what they provided. Be specific in your acknowledgement, by listing exactly what it was the person did for you. If the person watched the children for you, describe this and tell the person that it really helped you tremendously to have that worry off your mind during this hard time. Let the person know that her gesture really mattered a lot to you.
Make it a family event. One person should not be solely responsible for completing this entire task. Gather together several family members to help you. You can still write the letters yourself, but ask friends to address the envelopes, stuff them and place a stamp on them. Acknowledgement letters should be mailed within approximately two weeks after the service.