How to get over missing your boyfriend in a long-distance relationship

Written by kristen moutria
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How to get over missing your boyfriend in a long-distance relationship
Starting a long-distance relationship requires trust and stability. (Comstock/Comstock/Getty Images)

Long-distance relationships are notoriously difficult to maintain. Both the man and the woman involved miss each other greatly, and yet circumstances keep them away from each other for what may be extended periods of time. Communication is more difficult because it is not face to face and the risk of cheating can be greater because neither partner is close by. However, there are several productive things someone in a long-distance relationship can do to keep from obsessing about her boyfriend.

Skill level:


  1. 1

    Focus on your old interests. Before you got into this relationship, you may have been more heavily involved in things that interested you on your own. It may be a specific sport you enjoy or books you love to read. Whatever it is, it deserves your attention. Focusing on what makes you who you are will take your mind off missing your boyfriend to a certain degree. Learning to spend time doing things that are intrinsically satisfying to you will give you a higher perspective, keep you from being obsessive and give you joy that comes from doing something you genuinely love to do.

  2. 2

    Make new friends. While you may not be in the mood to go out and meet a bunch of new people when the only one on your mind is your boyfriend, expanding your circle of acquaintances will allow you to take your mind off missing him. Having a little fun with a new group of people can relax you, energise you and even inspire you to love your partner more because you will not be constantly stressed missing him. Furthermore, listening to others talk and spending time doing what other people like to do will make you a more balanced person with more people in your life than just one.

  3. 3

    Explore your physical location. If you are the one who moved away and you are in a new setting, don't just wish you were with your boyfriend. Instead, explore your new surroundings. If you are on a short trip in a different country, explore the sights of the region. Even if you are just in a different city, learn what there is to do and make it a point to try new things. Do not let the opportunity to enjoy a new place slip by you because you are too concentrated on your boyfriend. Finally, if you are not the one who moved away and you are still at your home, find places you have never visited to give yourself a feeling of newness. This will cause you to appreciate your settings and not wish to be somewhere else.

  4. 4

    Have an established "date night." Even though you are not physically with your boyfriend, having an established date night at least once a week will give you the closeness you need to be able to relax and focus on other day-to-day activities. On your date night, arrange to meet on Skype or MSN Messenger at a certain time and bring your own food. You can both get Chinese carry-out or some pizza and talk on a webcam. Another idea is to just bring your cellphone with you to a park and talk in nature. You could even arrange to watch the same movie at a specific time and then call each other afterward to talk about it. Having this time to connect is necessary at least once a week and will allow you to live your life apart with trust and confidence in the relationship.

Tips and warnings

  • Trust in your boyfriend when it comes to long-distance relationships; do not constantly call or demand time if he is busy living life. This makes the process easier and much less painful in the long run.

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