Teenagers can be very difficult for parents and teachers to figure out. They are sometimes rebellious and often want to do their own thing without adult interference. Teenagers are stuck in a stage halfway between childhood and adulthood and it can be a difficult stage to handle for them. Especially in teen boys, aggressive behaviour can result from these mixed feelings. This behaviour can also be triggered by other problems as well. Parents and teachers must work together to help a teenager manage aggressive behaviour.
Take your teen boy to a psychologist to be evaluated for depression, anxiety or other mental illness. Aggressive behaviour is often the result of treatable mental illness. With therapy and/or medication, the aggressive behaviour will usually lessen.
Speak with your teen boy about his behaviour. Aggressive behaviour has a root cause, and a teenager is likelier to reveal that cause if he feels safe in speaking about it. Approach the discussion from a concerned standpoint and reiterate that you just want to help him be happy.
Listen to what your teen has to say about things in his life. Even if you cannot get him to sit down and have a lengthy conversation, pay attention to the tone in which he speaks about things in his life, such as school work, friends and girlfriends. If his tone because angry or upset while speaking of a particular subject, this may likely be the problem.
Pick your battles. This method is most often used with young children to avoid power struggles. However, teen boys can also escalate issues in much the same way. Decide if it is really important that your son clean his room by the end of the week. Threatening to take away privileges for minor infractions can lead to built up anger, which leads to aggression.
Ignore passive-aggressive behaviours, such as sarcastic comments. These behaviours generally allow a teen to let go of his anger in non-threatening, non-destructive ways instead of letting it build up inside. When you react negatively to these behaviours, you are adding to the built up anger faster than he can let it out.
Model how you would like your son to act. If he sees mom and dad fight it out and throw things, he will learn that this is the way you should deal with your anger. Show him how adults discuss things with calm, rational words. Express your feelings and how the other person's actions have made you feel. Offer suggestions on how the other person could have made the situation better instead of worse. Show your teenage boy how to handle conflict civilly.
Set rules for your teen and the accompanying punishments if those rules are broken. A teen boy will have a harder time breaking the rules if he knows what he stands to lose. Be consistent and follow through with the punishment if an infraction occurs. Show your teen son that you are in control and what you expect of him.
Enrol your teen son into a boot camp for troubled teens or a military school. These types of programs are usually a last resort for parents and teachers who have tried everything to curb a teen boy's aggressive behaviour. These programs focus on respect and getting a teen boy's life back on the right track. Allowing aggression to remain a big part of a teen boy's life is setting him up for failure for the rest of his life.