How to Keep a Guy Interested in My Conversation

Written by emilia lamberto
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How to Keep a Guy Interested in My Conversation
Making eye contact shows that you're interested in the conversation. (business couple talking image by Pavel Losevsky from

Keeping a guy interested in a conversation may require a small amount of effort on your part. It is not enough to just sit and talk about the weather and expect the conversation to roll on with ease. Conversation starters that require only a yes or no answer will not get the results you're hoping for. However, you shouldn't be the only one putting effort in. Conversing is a two-way street.

Skill level:

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  1. 1

    Ask him for his opinion. Nothing opens up a man more than asking what he thinks about something. However, be careful about what you're asking. If you're asking, "Do I look fat in this outfit?" he may feel stuck. Instead, ask him how he feels about something that's going on in the world today like a presidential election or unseasonable weather overseas.

  2. 2

    Take note of your surroundings. If he seems to be losing interest in the conversation, reel him back in by commenting on something happening around you. For example, if you're at a mall and everyone seems to be in a hurry, say something like, "I wonder why everyone is in such a hurry. It's like they think the mall is going to run out of merchandise!" Keep a smile on your face. Cracking a subtle joke shows that you're down to earth and that you don't want the conversation to stop dead in its tracks.

  3. 3

    Make eye contact. If you're staring at the ground as you speak, not only will it be difficult to hear what you're saying, but you'll come off as insecure -- or worse, weird. Instead, make eye contact when expressing important points or asking questions. Do not hold contact the entire time as this may make him a bit uncomfortable.

  4. 4

    Talk about him. Ask him where he got his hat, what he likes to do or simply comment on something about him. For example, if he's into art, ask who his favourite artist is. If he takes photographs, ask what it is about photography that drew him in. These comments show that you're taking an interest in him.

  5. 5

    Keep a sense of humour. Poking fun at yourself in a silly -- but not over-the-top -- way can really open someone up. Not only does it show that you're not easily offended, but it shows that you're comfortable with who you are.

  6. 6

    Read body language. If he seems completely withdrawn from the conversation despite your best efforts to get a word out of him, it's probably best to end it there. However, if he seems nervous or unsure of what to say, help him out by asking questions and figuring out what he likes. Once you have an idea of his hobbies, branch out the conversation by implementing questions and conversation relating to that topic.

Tips and warnings

  • Don't forget to smile.
  • Do not gossip. While many women may enjoy gossiping back and forth, many men find it unattractive and uncomfortable. Just because your best friend enjoys talking smack about what the lady at the salon wore last week doesn't mean a guy will.
  • Do not use the entire conversation to talk about yourself. Not only will you come off as egotistical but you'll also appear superficial and rather boring. Although it's OK to mention a few things about yourself when asked, or if a topic you're interested in comes up, it's not OK to ramble on and on about how awesome you are (even if you are pretty awesome).
  • Avoid whining and complaining about your life. No one wants to listen to a chronic complainer or engage themselves in a conversation full of negativity.

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