How to Date While a Divorce Is Pending

Updated April 17, 2017

Dating while going through a divorce is generally acceptable, but there are limits to doing so. Caution and proper procedures must be adhered to avoid legal action or problems with your case. Many attorneys advise against dating while divorcing due to the stress it adds to the situation, but it is ultimately left to your discretion. It is best to consult your lawyer along with using your best judgment while deciding whether to date while going through your divorce.

Refrain from physical activity with your dates until the date of your divorce is final. Many states require a waiting period before the divorce is final to ensure the couple has executed all final attempts of working things out for the last time. During this time, you are considered legally married until the judge grants your divorce. Eliminating physical activity will avoid prosecution of adultery throughout this time if your state considers it illegal.

Speak with your ex about dating during the divorce. Find out how she feels about dating other people and if she plans to do it herself. While it may seem OK for you to do, it may bring upon feelings of jealousy or resentment from your ex. These feelings may result in outbursts or false accusations she assumed to be true, such as physical activity between you and those you are dating. Try to keep your dating profile low and do not make many public appearances with your dates if speaking to your ex-spouse is not a good idea.

Talk to your partners about the details of the divorce and expected time lines. Explain the situation entirely and gain their trust and support throughout this time. Be completely honest and open and do not eliminate important details such as how long it has been since you filed or when the divorce will be over. Let her know why it is you cannot go to certain places or experience physical activity. More likely than not she will fully understand and support you through this difficult time.

Set a good example for the court and your ex. Do not lead them to believe that your new relationship will affect living situations for your children or property division. Show stability for your children by not introducing them to your partners right away. Wait until the relationship is established and the child has had enough time to cope with the new changes. During this time, children may not understand why things are happening and may need time to adjust to the new atmosphere.

Consult your lawyer for further advice concerning your divorce. Ask specific questions on your state's adultery law and what you can and cannot do. Inquire whether dating will affect your custody case and how it will, if applicable. Find out the correct information directly from the source before taking the matter into your own hands. If any additional questions arise, be sure to ask them to your lawyer to prevent losing important arguments or disagreements in the settlement of the divorce.

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About the Author

Sherry Morgan has been professionally demonstrating her writing ability since 2005. Within her writing career, she has written for, Associated Content, Textbroker, and an extensive list of personal clients. She is currently working on her Associate of Applied Science degree in business management at MGCCC, focusing on business and creative writing.