What Are The Effects of a Narcissistic Mother?

Written by tammy cagle

Narcissistic individuals are selfish and self-absorbed; rarely able to give emotional return to a child or adult. Narcissists have an exaggerated sense of worth and importance; demonstrating arrogance and lacking the ability to feel sympathy or empathy on a true level.

What Are The Effects of a Narcissistic Mother?
Effects of a Narcissistic Mother ("Mad Girl's Love Song" is Copyrighted by Flickr user: nyki_m (Nicole Makauskas) under the Creative Commons Attribution license.)

Boundary violations

The narcissistic mother will violate the normal boundaries of her children, making them feel like extensions of herself. She may give away the property of her child for no reason other than for control.

Personal denial

The narcissistic mother will deny any wrongdoing on her part and demonstrates passive-aggressive behavior delivered in the form of loving concern. Confronting her passive-aggressive tendencies could result in her attempts to make the child appear to be crazy or unappreciative.

Center of Attention

The need of narcissistic mothers to be the center of attention at all times can be exhausting for the child. She will neglect the needs of a child in favor of making herself appear to be the one in need.

Early Childhood

When children grow up with a narcissistic mother, they are not aware of a mental disorder creating the problems throughout the lives of the children. The child will learn early to continually seek approval, attention and love by the parent, feeling they are not worthy of these emotions.


The adult child of a narcissistic mother will spent time trying to change the dynamics of the relationship through gifts, time, energy and multiple efforts at being the perfect child. Adult children of narcissistic mothers are left feeling inadequate, have problems expressing their emotions and have difficulties trusting their own insights, values and morals.

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